LDKBox

IT has been a long time since we last met.  For this I apologize.  There are /were a lot of reasons for not writing of late.  None of them were good.  It is not like I have been doing anything.  To bad I was not brought up Catholic.  IT would make it easier to accept the guilt that I feel for those that have so faithfully stopped by my site to see what or perhaps better stated “If” I had posted anything.  For weeks I never even thought of my blog.  I was to busy feeling guilty.  So on to my tale.

As mentioned I have a lot of men to look up to when thinking back on my life.  Some light, some fat, some bald, some educated and others self educated.  Most but not all had jobs, family, and everyday life happenings.  Which we all know can be trying and tense.  When I considered these men I had been thinking in my minds eye of a man that is not a long time friend but he certainly is a memorable and honorable man.  You know… the kind that of person that you want to be around because they are so much fun…. a cool guy.  I started thinking of him before I considered the topic.  We met in a school parking lot while we were waiting for our children to get out of school.  As the days progressed we started talking about this and that.  Sooner than later we started leaving the house earlier and earlier to see if the other was wanting to talk.  Realize that we are both retired but he is picking up a grand son and I am picking up my son.  He is twenty years my senior and is excellent health.  Enjoying retirement with his wife that had together operated several businesses in town and she was a real estate agent  full time.

Over the time our friendship grew and my own personal attachment to him became quite strong.  He literally marked the first male friend that I had ever had in Texas.  Come to find out this guy is an avid fisherman.  He and his wife go out fishing two or three days a week.  He eventually invited me out one day when his wife was going to be out of town.  To make a long story short I never had a better day telling tall tails while fishing.  I soon found out that he felt the same way.  I must also mention that Willie( I guess I should mention his name) was a major help in my recovery of cancer after treatments.  He helped me through some tough times while listening to me complain about a pain or lack of energy, or the terrible flem coming from my throat.  I was able to say to him things that I know my wife was getting tired of hearing but I still needed to say.  He was a true friend….He listened.

Something happened to me that made me stay inside my house.  I stopped writing on the blog.  I stopped a lot of things.  Since Christmas I visited with a High School classmate here in Killeen and that is it.  I had become somewhat of a recluse….and enjoying it but feeling guilty (pick a topic/reason now).  Mention anything and I start to feel guilty.  Mention my friend Willie and I start to feel even more guilty.  Somehow,  since before Christmas I did not go to his house, see him at school, or call  Willie on the phone until just the other day.  I had seen his wife in the car many times at school but since the boy’s were coming out  different exits we did not talk much.  Parking at dismissal time is at a premium at our school.  I would walk to school from my house because of it.  We always waved at each other.  One day she waved me to the car while  at a stop sign and  informed me that Willie  was not feeling the best.  I took that information and did nothing for over a week.

Here is the point of this post.  I did nothing.  That in and of itself is not bad.  One can choose to not drink alcohol.  One can choose to not go to college.  In each of these there is an outcome.   Each has their own good and bad points.  Just like this blog I have put off.  I can honestly tell you that I have felt guilty about not writing more(not guilty enough to start but guilty non the less).  I feel even more guilt due to the fact that I did not see Willie when he needed seeing.  I just was not there.  Huh, some friend…. some writer…eh?

Well,  I saw Willie today.  He was worse.  Arthritist  is a terrible disease.  He is swollen from head to toe.  I need to see him more just like I need to write more.  This may not make much sense but I feel less guilty.  Dare I say I feel ….better?  after seeing Willie.  We laughed a little and we talked a lot.  Only this time I did what a friend is supposed to do….Listen.  So with that knowledge I guess I should get to bloggin.  That is what bloggers do…is it not?

Comments (0) Mar 26 2010